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December 26, 2011
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EXT. ELEMENTARY SCHOOL COURTYARD-MIDDAY
Focus in on a PURPLE flower (Amaranth) and see a child's hand pick the flower. Shift to a 4th-grade girl with blonde hair pulled into two pigtails walking towards a group of girls when she nearly trips and realizes her shoe is untied. She is wearing a white polo and RED skirt, and her hair ties are RED as well. As she reaches down to tie it, the PURPLE flower is placed right in front of her face as CAM says:
CAM
(timidly)
Flora?
Shift to CAM, a very boyish young girl with short, black hair pulled into a ponytail. Note that she is very androgynous, and could be either a boy or a girl. She has on a white polo and BLUE long-sleeve shirt underneath, and a soft smile on her face.
CAM (cont'd)
I'm, uh, the new girl. You know, the one who sits across from you? Well, anyways... I just wanted to give you this flower. It's dumb, I know.
FLORA reaches up to receive the flower.
FLORA
Because my name is Flora?
CAM
No. Because it's pretty, like you.
FLORA and CAM freeze in place, as FLORA is clearly surprised by the openness of CAM'S words. FLORA begins to blush. The group of girls that FLORA was walking to realize she is not there and one girl with dark brown hair and freckles becomes angry.
NICOLE
(shouting)
Flora! Get over here!
FLORA becomes flustered and takes the flower in her hand. She stands up and sniffs the flower, her eyebrows furrowed but a tight smile on her face showing the contrast of her emotions.
FLORA
Thank you. That's very sweet. What did you say your name was again?
CAM
(blushing, pleased with Flora's reaction)
Uh, it's Cameron. But you can call me Cam, if you'd like.
FLORA
Cam. Well, I guess I'll see you in class, Cam.
FLORA runs over to the group of girls and CAM watches after her, then crouches down and starts playing with a caterpillar. FLORA joins the group of girls where the girls are admiring NICOLE'S new phone.
GIRL #1
So your dad gave it to you for no reason at all? Just like that?
NICOLE
(nodding)
Just like that! Daddy just said, "A girl like you deserves the latest ePhone!" And he bought it!
The other girls burst into praise and admiration, while FLORA looks down at her flower lovingly and begins to sniff it. NICOLE notices, frowns angrily, and then smiles wickedly.
NICOLE
Hey, Flora. Where'd you get that flower?
FLORA'S eyes snap open, then she purses her lips and looks away.
FLORA
Flower? Oh, you mean this flower? (shrugs) The new girl just gave it to me.
NICOLE looks over at CAM, squints her eyes and sneers.
NICOLE
(mockingly)
The new girl? You mean the one that looks like a boy?
The group of girls laugh, only encouraging NICOLE more and causing FLORA to turn a deep red and cringe a little.
NICOLE (CONT'D)
Why'd she give you a flower, anyways? Is she a lesbian?
NICOLE enunciates every syllable with a sneer on her face. FLORA squirms, clearly uncomfortable.
FLORA
Wh-What's that?
NICOLE
It's a girl... who like-likes other girls.
A chorus of EWs ensue from the other girls and Flora clutches onto the flower, looking away.
FLORA
E-Ew! That's so gross!
NICOLE
Yeah, mommy and daddy say that girls like that are a disgrace. (Pause) I bet she like-likes you... Flora, you're not a lesbian, are you?
FLORA
What?! No! Of course not! That's so gross!
NICOLE smiles and saunters closer to FLORA, who draws back.
NICOLE
Really? Then prove it. Give the flower back to her.
FLORA clutches the flower unsurely. NICOLE snickers, then starts taunting FLORA by singing, "CAM and FLORA sitting in a tree," and the other girls join in. FLORA wrings the flower and cringes visibly until she finally turns around and marches to CAM angrily. CAM is playing with a caterpillar on her hand, and turns around when she hears FLORA stomping towards her. She has a serene smile on her face, but when she sees the dark expression on FLORA'S face her own smile falls. FLORA'S lip quivers, and she finally starts ripping off the petals of the flower one by one.
FLORA
(as she rips the petals)
Here's... what I think... about your stupid... flower!
FLORA throws the stem of the flower in CAM'S face, who flinches only slightly and looks up at FLORA with a stoic expression on her face. She doesn't move the petals from her lap, and the two girls stare at each other for a long moment. FLORA turns around and walks back to the group of girls, who are laughing and cheering her on.
END SCENE 1
This is a story I'm writing about two girls who fall in love.
I got the first scene done! :dummy: Although I'm not entirely sure how to write a screenplay and this is my first time EVERRR! ^^;
Criticism is welcome, and if anyone knows how to write screenplays please tell me if I did something wrong! Also, the format is different on my Word document, and the indents are correct there. It's just off on DA. :/
The purpose of this first scene is also to point out that gender conformity and bullying starts in elementary school, or even before. I do NOT condone any of the actions that Flora or the other girls did, in case that wasn't obvious. I'm merely pointing out that homophobia starts at a young age and is learned from older people. We need to be more accepting and teach kids at a young age that it's okay to be gay~ :huggle:
Add a Comment:
 
:iconcedarhart:
Cedarhart Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2012  Student General Artist
If I'm remembering correctly, you can just write a journal entry, and post it as a deviation. Not positive, but I can check for you. You could indent it properly that way. Talk to you soon! :relax:
Reply
:icondarkwings16:
darkwings16 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2012  Student General Artist
hehe, looks good:D
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you!! :glomp:
Reply
:icondarkwings16:
darkwings16 Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2012  Student General Artist
Youre welcome!:D
Reply
:iconcedarhart:
Cedarhart Featured By Owner Jan 17, 2012  Student General Artist
Well, if THIS is your first try, you did a BANG-UP JOB! :D

It's is pretty wizard!
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Jan 17, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Oh my!!! Thank you!! :blush:

I mean, I had a lot of help from websites and had a layout to work with so... :giggle:
Reply
:iconcedarhart:
Cedarhart Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2012  Student General Artist
No matter! It is fantastic!
Reply
:iconbloodontheveil:
BloodOnTheVeil Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2012  Student General Artist
Wow, this is so good :) I can't wait for more
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks so much! I just put the second scene up yesterday. :)
Reply
:iconbloodontheveil:
BloodOnTheVeil Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2012  Student General Artist
You're welcome ^^ Yeah I saw it :)
Reply
:iconcaptianjakmoose:
captianjakmoose Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2012  Student Writer
Thank you for submitting this, i look forward to forward to its continuation!
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks! I think I might even have the next one up today! :D
Reply
:iconcaptianjakmoose:
captianjakmoose Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2012  Student Writer
I hope you submit it to our group too!
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Which group is this? I'd be glad to submit it! And I just put up the second part! :)
Reply
:iconcaptianjakmoose:
captianjakmoose Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2012  Student Writer
Yurilit, its taken us a bit to post anything, sorry about that
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Oh, I think I tried submitting or I've submitted it already. :) If its not there and my request expired I'll try submitting it again.
Reply
:iconcaptianjakmoose:
captianjakmoose Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2012  Student Writer
Its there, thank you! Ill read it as soon as i can!
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks for your interest in the story, it really means a lot! :hug:
Reply
:iconjez123:
Jez123 Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2011  Student Writer
Dude, I can't wait! I can already tell this is going to be awesome :D I don't usually like reading plays, but this totally caught my eye, and now I'm hooked lmao can't wait for the next one(: I'll have to Watch you so I know when the next scene comes out ;D
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Yay! Another follower!!! :boogie: Thanks for watching! The next one will be out soon, promise! Glad you like it! :D
Reply
:iconjez123:
Jez123 Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2011  Student Writer
Hoorayy! :D
Reply
:iconmeliphonse:
Meliphonse Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2011
This reminds me of when I was in elementary school,and I hung out with a group of girls who ALWAYS said,"That's so gay." and I always found something wrong with it.I didn't think of it as a nice thing to say,and I got defensive about it and the teacher got mad at ME and not them,even though they said it right in front of the teacher.I got so upset about it even though I didn't quite know what being 'gay' meant.I just knew it was how some people were and I just took it like they were teasing other people for being themselves.I'm bisexual myself and I'm proud of who I am.I love this story!Can't wait to read more. =3
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I know, I hate it when people use the expression, "That's so gay!" It's one of my pet peeves alongside the expression, "I would shoot myself!" (The latter is because I had a close friend who killed himself, which is another story in and of itself.) But I can't believe your teacher reprimanded YOU. Homophobic teachers like that are the reason I'm writing this story. Our generation needs to be more accepting, otherwise the new generation won't be. I'm so glad you said something to those girls, and I'm bi too! *high five* I'm glad you like it and I'll have more up soon!!
Reply
:iconmeliphonse:
Meliphonse Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2011
True that.
I had a cousin who killed himself,so anything to do with suicide that's supposed to be a 'joke' is unnaceptable to me.
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Exactly, me too! I'm glad you understand the significance of harmful "jokes" like that. :hug:
Reply
:iconmrs-drwho:
mrs-drwho Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2011  Student Writer
i'm in tons of plays and i'd like to point out that usually actions are in italics. this screenplay is awesome and has a very important message. older people need to b more accepting so the next generation will b more accepting.
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Yeah, I've been studying plays to understand how they're written, but I think screenplays are written differently... Not entirely sure, but thanks for the suggestion! I'll look into it. :) And thanks!! :D
Reply
:iconmrs-drwho:
mrs-drwho Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2011  Student Writer
welcome!
Reply
:iconblackheie:
blackheie Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2011
Awww thats soo sad, I hated it when people fall under presure to there so called "friends" its terrable to hurt someone that way. but its a good story well done love *claps*
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks, there'll be more soon! :D
Reply
:icongumagummybear:
GumaGummybear Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2011  Student Traditional Artist
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww poor cam!!!!1
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I know!!! There will be a lot of poor Cam's in the story, but there are lots of good moments too! promise!!!
Reply
:icongumagummybear:
GumaGummybear Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2011  Student Traditional Artist
ok i'll be sure to keep reading!
Reply
:iconkanon-markii:
Kanon-MarkII Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2011  Student Filmographer
wow, really nice :)
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you so much! :D
Reply
:iconkanon-markii:
Kanon-MarkII Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2011  Student Filmographer
you're welcome :)
Reply
:iconharukamoon:
HarukaMoon Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2011  Student Writer
i actually did have a tomboyish freind in elementry school who I had a crush on. I think she liked me too. I have no clue why we never said anything but maybe this was the reason. Can't wait to see what happens next
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Aww, that's so sad. :( But yeah, kids can be vicious. That sounds a lot like something that happened to me in elementary school with another girl, too. I'm glad you liked it, though! :)
Reply
:iconharukamoon:
HarukaMoon Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2011  Student Writer
:hug:
Reply
:iconproudeyesneverlie:
proudeyesneverlie Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2011
wow, i love this!
i think it is very important to point out how young homophobic bullying can begin. you've done a good job with this.


i can't wait for the next installment :eager:
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks! I'll have it up soon and I'm glad you liked it! :D
Reply
:iconthejunkyardfaerie:
thejunkyardfaerie Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
N'aww
I cannot wait to read more of this!
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Haha, thanks! I'll be sure to have some more up soon! :D
Reply
:iconlady-chan101:
Lady-Chan101 Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
That was very beautiful and sad at the same time. I was treated pretty similar in my elementary school, but thankfully I didn't let it get to me. Please continue when you can!! ^_^
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you!! It's the same here. I was very tomboyish in elementary school, and I found that that's when kids are least accepting and most cruel. I didn't really take notice, though, because I had a few close friends that liked me for me~ I'm glad you could relate, though!! :)
Reply
:iconmasterofwordsandart:
MasterofWordsAndArt Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
how old are they supposed to be?
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
In this first scene, they're in fourth grade, so 9/10 I think... But later on in the story (next scene, actually) they're 17 and have grown up quite a bit. (I think I mentioned they were in fourth grade in the story, if not sorry ^^;)
Reply
:iconmasterofwordsandart:
MasterofWordsAndArt Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
it's alright. and kind of sad but this is pretty true. i've heard fourth graders be weirded out by lgbt teens. but i also know this little girl who likes to hang with my VERY OUT pansexual friend.
Reply
:icontelkiss:
Telkiss Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Yeah, I really wanted to point out how cruel young kids can be and that gender conformity really starts in elementary school. I know there are plenty of kids who are accepting and kind to the lgbt community, like my younger cousin. :) I just wanted to say that we need to step in while kids are still young and tell them that if they're a boy they can play with dolls or wear dresses, and if they're girls they shouldn't be expected to have princesses as role models.
Reply
:iconmasterofwordsandart:
MasterofWordsAndArt Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
well, i plan on letting my future kids read some of my lighter shonen-ai/shojo-ai stories. i want them to know that it's fine. i'm also gonna' let them read some of my poems. i want them to be accepting.
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